who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
