I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
so much tequila, so little girl.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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