I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
