Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
We need to get me chipped asap
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
