The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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