I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize