it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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