P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
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