I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
