You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
