She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize