i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
It was like getting head from an anaconda
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I think i got beer on your cat.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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