Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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