so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
