WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
