I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
