Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
