It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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