pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
He? As in you personified your dick?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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