I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
