i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
