I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
