covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
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