sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Randomize
