I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
