He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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