so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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