i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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