what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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