I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Quick, to the slutcave!
accomplished twins. life is a go
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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