i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
well you can't waste a boner
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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