Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Randomize
