Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
