i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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