At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
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