So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
