porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Randomize
