Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize