that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Randomize
