I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
