i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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