id be glad to
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
ttyl tear gas
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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