the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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