Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
