i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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