These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize