been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
What drink are we having for lunch?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Randomize
