is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
two words: eviction party
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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