So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize
