Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
